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How have I changed this year

Well dear readers, it’s come to pass, I'm leaving today.

I will be leaving my Family, my Friends, my house, my school, my city,
my daily routine, and enter a foreign country:

The United States of America

This is not a joke. YFU has repeatedly mentioned that the exchange
year is actually two years (do I smell a bargain?), In that
Re-adjusting to your “home” country is often harder than adjusting to
your host country. Let me ratify that statement with a simplified
example: The Colored Glasses Analogy

Jack grew up in a country where everyone wears blue tinted glasses,
he’s never known anything else and everything was fine. THEN Jack goes
to a foreign country, where everyone wears red tinted glasses, he’s
never seen anything like this before and finds it strange, as he
adapts to life there he puts on a pair of red tinted glasses too,
everything is normal and fine. THEN Jack travels back to his home
country and suddenly everything is purple. He asks a friend “what
happened, why is everything purple?”, and the friend responds with
“what are you talking about? Everything is blue.”

Overview: Whereas the view of the host country is something new that
the student accepts as new and tries to adapt to, the home
country, a place that has always been familiar and comfortable,
suddenly changes in the way that you observe it. This could
be very jarring and depressing for the student because
your perspective of the world is permanently shifted.

We’ll just have to wait and see what it’s like. Will definitely be weird




What will I take with me?

Instead of giving you a check list of T-Shirts and toothpaste, let’s
think about things I’ve gained this year.


Speaking up, different opinions doesn’t mean you can’t be friends

I’ve experienced sexism, racism, homophobia and xenophobia here in
Germany. Yeah, I’m a white, heterosexual male, but that doesn’t mean I
tolerate that behavior, I want to stick up for my friends and family
members.

And yes these problems are just as prevalent in the US, but living in
a different culture for a year has definitely allowed me to notice
them more.

There is a difference between adapting to a culture, getting used to the different ways things are done/viewed in different cultures, and tolerating
hate. I would often be at odds between wanting to adapt to a new
culture (a personal goal for my exchange year), and not wanting to
accept instances of bigotry.
Please never feel like you have to pick between the two.
Maybe it just worked in Germany, but just plain up explaining how you feel to the perpetrator, giving them a glimpse of your context, and keeping it respectful has helped me diffuse the situation so that I let people know when they cross my lines, but remain viewed as a peer and not some 3rd party foreigner passing judgement.


I guess what I want to say is that I've become more confident in expressing my opinions, and sticking up for myself.

I mean, I had to represent the US in group discussions, I didn't want to make a generalization, so instead I would give my opinion, and then try to give people a general overview of the different sides of national issues in an objective way.
I did this A LOT, and people didn't judge me for it (which I had been afraid of before).

Thinking about everything complexly, nothing is an analogue, opinions are kinetic and not necessarily comparable with other opinions on a Left vs. Right spectrum.

I've become more outgoing:
Ok, I've heard from several German friends that, at the beginning of the year, people in my school wanted to talk to me and get to know me (I was the new exchange student), but they mostly weren't comfortable coming up to me and introducing themselves. I wanted to get to know these guys, so I bit down and approached lots of people everyday, asking tons and tons of questions. Yes it was very direct, yes it was forced sometimes, and yes I embarrassed myself, but eventually people got the drift that they could talk to me and that I wanted to be a real part of  the student body. The rest was just fun, but the outgoing-ness stayed, and I hope it'll stick around longer.

I want to think about my first year in college like another exchange year. If I can just stay in the mindset I'm in now, my curiosity and extroverted-ness should be able to make it the best year of my life all over again.

Well I need to finish packing, I'm a bit sad, nervous, but for the most part delighted that this year went like it did. I wouldn't change it for anything. I know I'll come back, I know I'll stay connected to my friends and family here.
It's a tiny bit bittersweet. but...

WHATEVER, I'VE GOT TO GO CATCH MY PLANE!

Catch ya' later Deutschland. Ich werde dich vermissen.
-Jack McCarthy